Old People Are Hilarious

I am currently the director of therapy at a nursing home in Texas. I have worked as a speech-language pathologist for over 3 years in the nursing home setting, and I have found during my time there, old people say what they mean and mean what they say. They have no filter. They figure, hell, life is too short to be polite and use social graces. And it's because of them, I decided to start this blog. Those hilarious one liners that make me love my job and look forward to going to work everyday. They say you can't teach an old dog new tricks. I challenge those people--you can. And they can teach you some tricks along the way.

Friday, August 26, 2011

Wilma and Geanine

Wilma is hard of hearing. Actually, she can't hear a damn thing.  You have to yell at her if you want her to hear anything. Geanine, on the other hand, is the epitome of demure. She has a soft sophisticated feel to her voice and has a tendency to be a little dramatic. She's usually very soft spoken and rarely raises her voice.

Wilma and Geanine both spend their days in the lobby. They like to watch the people go in and out and make comments about every single thing they see.  As we're all aware, it's been HOT in Texas. And the other day, Geanine decides to comment about the weather.  She says to Wilma, "It's hotter than Hades." Wilma gives her a blank stare and says, "I can't hear you.  Speak louder." Geanine leans closer and yells, "It's hotter than hell!!!" Wilma looks at her. "I still can't hear you." Geanine yells, "Hell! Hell! It's hotter than hell!!!" Wilma shouts back at her, "I'm not going to hell!!! If anyone is going to hell, it's you, you ole biddy!!!!"

HAHA

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